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June 18, 2015 / ljbradburn-Smith

Office Pet Hates

I think I am a fairly patient person, I’d even go so far as to say laid back, but something happens when I enter my workplace, I become a monster. Let’s call her work-Lyd. I don’t like work-lyd and when she is at work she doesn’t like any of these things:

Sellotape – the sound of sellotape with haunt my dreams for years to come. All you need to know is that I can hear it through the walls and it can go on for hours at a time.

Paperclips – as much as I love cute mini things (I even have a tiny Pet battery called Henry) there is one exception – a mini paperclip. When I reach into my paperclip box I want a paperclip that can actually clip on to at least two pieces of paper. Mini paperclips just don’t cut it i’m afraid.

People – Not my lovely friendly friends and family, not the nice people who call up for something in a nice, polite, non-accusatory way, not the delivery people who sometimes bring biscuits, just all the other ones.

The photocopier/printer/scanner/always beeps for no reason and stops working whenever it feels like it machine.

Pointless tasks – the ‘can you print this and then go to the cupboard, turn around five times, shout ‘i’m a mug’, find a mug, photocopy the mug, write it all in an email, on a spreadsheet and stand in the middle of the room’ tasks.

8:30am (ish) – 1:00pm & 2:00pm – 5:00pm (on the dot) – every single hour that isn’t lunchtime.

Moaning – I moan, everyone moans, I’m moaning now (but then I am at work).

See I told you she wasn’t very nice. Home-Lyd is much better, she loves everyone.

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